Beckham’s showing off his tummy time skills to Grandma and Grandpa.
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Mute us please
“Why is everyone singing about bread?”
Jackson during our Rosh Hashanah Zoom party
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2020 Nightmares
I had a dream last night that we were at a wedding and while I was in the bathroom washing my hands, I had put Beckham down behind me in his car seat carrier.
Next thing I knew, my cousin had picked him up and started kissing and playing with him.
Oh, the horror!!!!!!!!!
It’s crazy that this would set off a sense of panic — that these are the things of nightmares these days.
(Edited to add: I’ve since had other fearful COVID-related dreams:
- I was meeting up with a friend who was pregnant and — at my suggestion — we walked into a Starbucks that was jam-packed with people in line (not socially distanced). My friend ran outta there as fast as she could, and I felt awful for bringing her there.
- I was at my going-away party for work, and another friend tried to give me a hug. WHAT WAS SHE THINKING?!
Thankfully, I woke up from such horrible dreams! haha)
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Too close for comfort
We learned that someone from Beckham’s therapy clinic tested positive for the coronavirus. It wasn’t his physical therapist, and no one we had direct contact with, but it still totally freaked me out. The place is so tiny, I worried it could have easily spread.
Plus they are only shutting down for cleaning for one day. Anybody who had direct contact with that person was told to stay home and quarantine, but I don’t understand why they wouldn’t make everyone get tested. I believe they are going by the guidelines that a direct contact is 15 minutes or more… but I wouldn’t be comfortable if our physical therapist had ANY contact with this person.
(Edited to add: The CDC did change the definition of a direct contact later to a cumulative 15 minutes even if it’s broken up — say, a few minutes here, a few minutes there. Yet another reason to not get comfortable! They are still learning how this works.)
I’m pretty sure it was a student observer because they updated their COVID protocols and the one change I noticed was that student observers are no longer allowed inside. I get that this is complicated, but why did they ever allow students in? We are bringing our newborn baby in — there shouldn’t be anyone in the office who is not necessary.
After some debating back and forth, we are going to skip our next session so that two full weeks have passed before we go back. It’s hard because you don’t want to make things worse for Beckham’s physical therapy by skipping. But I also didn’t want to risk that our PT might have caught it and was asymptomatic.
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Bite size?
The downside to ordering groceries online… why do they even make boxes this small?!?!
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Womp womp
For some reason I was talking about germs, and Jackson, who has started asking “why” to anything and everything we say, began asking a bunch of questions.
“Why?”
“What does that mean?”
“How does it work?”
I was feeling like it was a productive explanation, especially given the times we’re in.
Until Jackson capped it all off by putting his hands up to his face and, in slow motion, licked them over and over.
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COVID casualty
This is so sad. Southport Lanes is closing down after nearly 100 years in business.
It was a super fun bar that had a small, old-fashioned bowling alley inside. It was right by our old condo in Chicago and we used to go there frequently. It’s also where Justin and I had our second date!
I just can’t believe it has been around for almost a century, but now can’t survive COVID.
Another place that has shut down that I was so bummed about was Cozymel’s in Wheaton. This was a Mexican restaurant where we had my wedding shower, and maybe baby shower, too. And one of Kelly’s showers, too. It was our go-to for events — so fun and festive.
Boo hoo!
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Pandemic play
I drove by a school today with kids outside for recess. Each kid was standing on their marked spot on the blacktop. All equally spaced out. And no one was moving except to kick a ball back and forth to each other. It was the strangest sight! So sad!
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Day at the park
Finally starting to get out of the house a bit more, lol. And this time we actually got out of the car, too!
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More birthday fun
The celebrations continued for Jackson’s birthday — this time my family came over for a pandemic-style party.
And we finally got to do our “birthday safari,” which I originally planned for his actual birthday but that got delayed by the rain. Basically I hid a bunch of inflatable jungle animals all around our yard for Jackson to find.
We did this over and over again all weekend, along with more and more cupcakes!
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COVID baby
I have been in a couple of community web boards through the What to Expect app that I joined at the beginning of my pregnancy. They’re basically forums for pregnant women and moms to ask questions and talk amongst each other. One of my groups was specifically for babies due in June 2020, so it was a collection of women who were all going through the same stages of pregnancy.
It was crazy to see the number of coronavirus-related posts in the first few months of the pandemic. There were so many that they ended up creating a new board specifically for COVID, and I read it religiously every night, lol. It was interesting to see what was going on in different places and what people were experiencing. And somewhat helpful, too, since the policies and advice for pregnant women were all over the place.
These days those posts have decreased dramatically. There’s not too much virus-related activity any more I think because there’s just more information now and we have a better idea of what to do and how to protect ourselves.
A new post in the June Babies group, though, caught my eye. One mom wrote a poem about the pandemic — apparently while rocking her baby to sleep?! Ummm what? I wish I could be so productive and creative at that time!
I’m sharing it here because it is so relatable, having a June baby myself. Reading it reminds me of how totally insane that all was at the beginning. I still sometimes can’t believe that this is real life!
COVID Baby; A “poem” about having a baby during a pandemic
CCiaEllenSep 9, 2020 at 4:05 AM
Hello mommas! I wrote this one night while I rocked my little pandemic baby to sleep. I thought some other moms might be able to relate to it! I know we are so blessed to have these little ones, but I also wanted to recognize the challenges of having a baby during such an uncertain time. I say “poem” because it’s really just all my thoughts scribbled down. 😅
COVID Baby
It started with your family will have to wait in the waiting room
Then they said absolutely no visitors
No hospital introductions
Meeting through a window
Moments missed
Memories put on pause
No baby showers
No social gatherings
No in person celebrating
No hug from my mom when I’m feeling overwhelmed and scared at 39 weeks pregnant
Virtual maternity care
In person OB appointments alone
Did I ask the right questions?
Did I miss anything the doctor said?
It sure would be nice to have another set of ears here…I need my support person
Hearing baby’s heartbeat, a sacred sound shared between the OB and the momma to be
What will my labor be like?
Wear a mask?
No support person allowed?
Separated from the baby?
Feeling alone and anxious about all the unknowns
Don’t go out, pregnant women are high risk…
…actually you are okay, just don’t go out close to your due date because they will separate you from your baby if you test positive after labor and delivery
Trying to prepare for baby’s arrival
Baby essentials are backordered
Nothing will arrive for months
Will the crib come in time?
Will I have a car seat ready for my baby?
The store is out of wipes
Diapers are running low too
Formula is limited to 3 per customer
The time is drawing near
Only your significant other is allowed in
You must take a COVID test
Wear a mask
Don’t leave your room
Wear your badge that says “screened”
“Hi I’m your nurse, Becca” muffled behind the barrier of a mask
5 masked faces helping me deliver
I sure wish my mom was here, she is waiting in the parking lot…that’s as close as she can get…she was suppose to be here
I guess COVID didn’t read my birth plan 😒
“Good news, you tested negative for COVID!”
…Oh good, I can hold my baby
I did it!! He is here!
My world is complete
Newborn snuggles in the safe bubble of the hospital
“Here comes the sun” plays in the background as COVID patients are released
Wow I love my husband
He is my only support
This must be hard on him, I can tell he needs a break from it all…but he stays by my side because he’s all I have right now
“Good news! It’s time to go home!”
Woohoo! It’s time to go home! But…
Oh no…it’s time to go home…
Do I let them hold the baby?
Do I let them in the house?
Should we introduce the baby to grandparents through the barrier of a window?!
Please wash your hands!!
On the outside I say “yes come visit”…on the inside I am riddled with fear and anxiety
Appointments with the peditrician alone
Making decisions about our child…alone
My husband and I are a team, can he come too?
“No, we only allow one parent due to COVID”
Updating the proud father after well-baby visits
“Yes dear, the doctors appointment went well. No, I forgot to ask that…I forgot to ask that too…I guess I was distracted by holding the baby and juggling it all by myself.”
The baby might be getting sick…
Do I take him to the doctor? Do I risk exposure? Has he been exposed? He just coughed…could it be COVID?!
Am I too anxious?
Do I have PPD or PPA?
Is this amount of anxiety normal when you have a baby during a global pandemic?
No mommy support groups
Limited visits from family and friends
No outings with the baby
Just stay at home…it’s safer there
This isn’t what I had in mind when I saw those little blue lines…but many women don’t ever get to see those lines…God has blessed me so much
Feeling guilty for wishing this was different…but it’s okay to recognize that this is hard, right?
Oh my little COVID baby
I will rock you
I will hold you in this bubble until the storm passes
And it will pass
And then we will emerge from our safety net called home and face the world together
We will be stronger, because we only had each other for the start of your life
We will cherish these memories, the months where we were forced to slow down and stay home
Someday you won’t want to stay home with me
Someday we will get so busy that we are barely at home
I am blessed to have you in my life
I would do it all again a million times if it meant I got to hold you in my arms at the end of it all
So tonight, I’ll hold you tight, rock you a little longer, and keep you safe…my little COVID baby
Written by Ciara S.
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Happy birthday, Jackson!
Quarantine birthday — plus a rainy day — but that can’t keep us away from chocolate cake! I can’t believe Jackson is already 3 years old!!!! How is that possible?!!
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